Glory be, our friends are back!

Our friends and neighbors came back from furlough and we are SO happy! What a joy it is to have other ADULTS, not to mention four lively little girls, around the compound again. There are friends for everyone! YEAH!!!!!

And, an amazing thing happened while they were on furlough. Steve, who had been diagnosed with MS and has been struggling with it for YEARS, found out that in fact he does NOT have MS, but is allergic to MSG! Praise the LORD! So here he went from having a terminal illness to only having a food allergy (and there just isn’t even a lot of that used here). He has his life back again, Melinda has her husband back, and the kids have their dad back!! Thank you Lord!

The kids were SO glad to get back together again. They played from all afternoon until dinner. Frankie got a wee bit overwhelmed at first as he was quite the hot item, being new and cute and all, but soon got used to it and had fun. The best was when he was hugging feisty little 19 month old Hannah. It’s funny how little people just like other little people! Sadly I didn’t get any pictures of the two of them.

The older youngsters got out all their musical instrument toys and L’s microphone and quickly formed a band. Janet is the lead singer : -) Lucky Russian neighbors to be treated with this serenade, eh? They didn’t even have to pay for the concert!

I liked this picture because you can see Ella’s envious looks at Sophia’s guitar. L was doing this the whole time!

The “stage.” Our band consists of two five year olds and two seven year olds. The seven year olds are about six months apart and the five year olds are six months apart. Quite the crew ;)

Ella didn’t last long before abandoning the tambourine and breaking forth with dancing!

I snuck a picture of Frankie so that you could see his new hair due, which I finished on Tuesday. I love it! He is still in the do-not-smile-at-the-camera-whatever-you-do stage so I’ve simply stopped taking pictures of him. It’s a control issue so I’m not going to play that game.

And of course there’s nothing like being reunited with your best friend!

Crazy kids!!! Although two years apart these two are the BEST of friends. Ella has lots of friends but Janet is the FAVORITE!

Then they doubled up on the swing – up, up and away!

Although Janet’s head is chopped off in this picture, you can catch a glimpse of Ella’s look of delight!

Janet was the one interested in Frankie’s background and where he’d come from. She stated that I was his mom now and asked if he’d come from an orphanage (very astute, Janet!). I find kids adopted at “older” ages (Janet was adopted at age three, like Ella) so interesting! They do NOT take having parents for granted, are interested that other kids get parents too, and are very empathetic for kids who don’t. They also seem to really connect with each other. Kinda sweet actually....

Four Months!

Tuesday, the 23^rd, was the four month anniversary of Frankie’s homecoming.

As time goes by I am beginning to understand Frank a lot more. He has been difficult in that he holds everything in (unlike his sister who lets it out for all the world to know!) and does not express himself during a traumatic or uncomfortable event, almost freezing his face - often with a little smile on it – and will willingly go along with anything! This can give the impression that he’s “just fine” or even enjoying himself. It’s usually after the event that he lets you know that he’s not fine and that it upset him and made him insecure and mad. Sadly, he does this in many of the same passive aggressive ways that several of my family members have expressed themselves my entire life. Needless to say, I do not handle these behaviors so well in my little son due to the tension and unhappiness they’ve caused in my past! I think a lot of this is why it’s been a bit more difficult for me to attach with Frank then it was for me to attach with Ella, even though he was a whole year younger and has adapted and adjusted more quickly. I also see a lot of myself in him (much more than with Ella) which may be another reason why I’ve struggled with him more than I ever did with Ella.

I have learned, and am learning, to read his cues that he’s uncomfortable and could use some help, usually when someone (very often another older child) picks him up or starts to dominate him (even playfully) in any way. He is a shy boy and does not handle being picked up or made over, although he doesn’t cry and goes along with it seemingly willingly. Mind you he’s not unfriendly and is getting more and more confident but unless he initiates, he does not handle it well.

I’m also coming to suspect that being abandoned at the age of fourteen months, as opposed to Ella’s three months, hurt him far more deeply. Ella struggled to overcome the effects of institutionalization and the fact that she had NO mother for the first three years, while Frankie is different. I think that it hurt him very deeply to be abandoned by his first mother and that it will take more than just a few happy months in a new home for him to get over it and deeply trust a mother again. Poor little kid. I don’t think that he was abused as he has a very kind and gentle nature, something that he had to learn and get from someone. He is covered in scars but is a MAJOR scab picker so even the simplest bug bite, when picked, can turn into a scar. And he was definitely never malnourished!

I can’t fully understand or heal my children’s past hurts but I can point them to Someone who can. What a comfort.

Miracles happen!!!!

I witnessed a miracle yesterday. I saw a skinny, bald, wheezing, sick little girl with a U.S VISA in her passport, which stated that she was the “Adopted child of ____________”, headed for the airport!!!!

I saw a little girl who was attaching awesomely with her committed mother and who has a family who will give her time, love and commitment, not to mention good food and medical care! And, while wheezing away like a wind broke horse, she really did seem to be content whilst slowly munching away on her potatoes.

CONGRATULATIONS AMY AND COURT!

This is a huge miracle considering the latest turn of events on February 3rd concerning the U.S denying children like little Sarah visas. Praise the Lord for the Ugandan judge who cared enough about Sarah’s well being to grant Amy and Court her full and final adoption so that the U.S would issue her a visa home.

Sadly, the visa situation here in Uganda still does not look good (which makes Sarah’s departure even more miraculous!). This is NOT an issue that Ugandans need to solve – WE AMERICANS need to! Ugandan lawyers and child advocates are busy working away but the Ugandan side of things is really not the issue. It’s the Americans. THEY should be the ones working away and trying to sort things out but they’re not (to my knowledge anyways). This is NOT a Ugandan problem, it’s an American one!

Please, contact your congressmen (and anyone else who has some clout!) about this situation and ask them to put pressure on the Consular and Vice Consular to resolve this issue QUICKLY (you can refer to my previous letter if you need to).

First priority should be the American families already here in Uganda with Legal Guardianship of their children, who need to get out of here WITH their kids.

Second should be permanently resolving this issue so that the doors will be open to other Ugandan children to be adopted in the States in the NEAR future (like, this year!). Sadly, Ugandan orphans are not high on anyone’s list of priorities.

When I start getting discouraged and thinking about all the kids who are being effected by this, I can think of little wheezing Sarah and how God got her home! Truly a miracle! And I pray that there will be more miracles happening in the U.S embassy regarding these IR-4 visas.

Happy 5th Birthday, Ella!

Last Tuesday, the 9^th, was Ella’s fifth birthday! We had a small, home party on the 9^th and then the big shindig on Saturday.

Tuesday’s party consisted of a lemon pie, ice cream and presents, with me, Frank and Sarah doing the honors of singing.

Being sung to

Blow it out sister, blow it out!

Granny got her three dvd’s and my big presents were a computer and bouncy ball, both of which I’d bought this summer in the States.

She LOVES her bouncy ball – bounces on it while watching movies, listening to music, playing outside, and just about all the time! Frank for some reason is scared of it! Could it be because of all the princesses on it... ?

And she loves her computer too!

She likes to play with it anywhere and everywhere too

I love her look of concentration in this pic. It has a bunch of educational type activities on it and she’s becoming quite the little typist. Its great for her to practice her letters on and for learning to use the mouse! I’m actually amazed at how much she’s learned in the last two years, just through unstructured play. The kid almost knows her entire alphabet without me teaching it to her at all!

This year I planned on a “small” party with just a “few” of our close friends. Well, we are very BLESSED with many close friends and we whittled it down to a mere 27 for the party : -)! So funny that God gave me such a social child. Ella LOVED it – she just loves having friends come over! They were all either neighbors, from work/church and our friends, Harriet and Lydia, who worked at Ella’s babies home, with their families. L, Frank and I had an absolute blast. You can’t have a good party without good people to make it! God has blessed us SO MUCH with such GREAT FRIENDS!

Sarah had organized for the samosas (which actually turned out to be small pies they were so big!) and chapattis to be made, then we fried up some sausages, I bought some potato chips, made a fruit salad and the cake, had two crates of soda a box of bottled water and wallah! A great, simple party and EASY!

The trampoline, as always, was a great hit with the youngsters

And chatting and visiting was a hit with the adults!

Oscar enjoying the horse swing

Then of course, it was time for the birthday cake!

Mom lights the candles and everybody sings

Ella blows out the candles

Mom helps L cut the cake, while Frankie and Aquila look on!

The birthday girl serves the cake

Frank, the birthday brother, served as a napkin holder

For kids like L, serving the cake is much more fun than actually eating it yourself!

What a fun time we had! Our first guests arrived at 2pm and our last guests left at 7:30pm. Ella was an excellent hostess and birthday girl and Frank did AWESOME himself. Exhibited all the signs of a well attaching little boy and I was so pleased. Way to go, Frankie boy!

Oddly, the culmination of this party was the hunting and killing of a FIVE FOOT COBRA in the yard about two hours after our last guests left! Ha! We beat the sucker like a piñata to kill it but sadly, no candy fell out;) And everything was going so normally...