Happy Anniversary Ella Monica Halland!!

Today is Ella’s six month anniversary of being home! What an amazing last six months it has been. It seems like she’s always been with us and I can’t imagine what I did without her. What a boring person I was! What did I DO all day? I sure wasn’t home as much because, other than my dogs, there was no one to come home to. Now I look forward to coming home after work everyday, just so I can see little L.

Ella is changing everyday and developing incredibly quickly. She is a lot different now then she was even a month ago when my mom was here. Although still young for her age, she is quickly catching up. She has learned to calm herself when over stimulated, discovered that she actually owns things, and is incredibly confident and social. Her sense of humor is really blossoming, too! Oh yah. And she HAS HAIR!

She has gone through normal “baby” or toddler stages very quickly in the last six months. Right now I think she’s on the brink of her “terrible two’s” even though she’s three and a half years old. She has started the “I WANT _____” and being rather dissatisfied with things and wanting more. She is also starting to feel confident enough to exert a tad bit of independence. The other day I told her to tidy up and she blurted out “NO!” The surprised look on both of our faces made us both start to laugh. She quickly picked up her toys and it was such an “oops” moment that I didn’t even give her a lecture. She knew it was wrong so I didn’t have to! But it was there in her head so I know that more of it might be coming. I feel like God gave me a 5.5 month reprieve to get myself together (with some MAJOR help from my Mom) before giving me any real “normal” discipline issues. The first 5.5 months seemed to be dealing with institutionalization issues, basic social skills and trusting and attaching, where now it’s turning into more “heart” issues and training.

Ella isn’t blatantly naughty or disobedient but will instead sob pitifully when asked to do something that she doesn’t really want to do, usually because it’s “too hard” and her mommy won’t help her. Then it will take her FOREVER to complete the task. I still don’t know how to deal with this. Holding out on her just makes me mad and cranky so I need to find another way.

As an only child I know that my struggle will be helping her understand that the world does NOT revolve around her and that there are others out there too. Now I know that all of us struggle with thinking this to some degree– I do and I was the youngest of three girls with two parents! Imagine a little girl who is not only an only child but has a single parent that can focus ALL of their attention on her! Yikes. Right now I think it’s a normal developmental stage she’s going through but I have known only children who went through their entire childhood and teenage years, into adulthood thinking this! And no, the solution is NOT having another child… 

The girl LOVES her little home here and her dogs and is incredibly confident when she is here. She is quite attached to our neighbors, her Uncle Gift and Aunt Kathryn, and they really are like family. Ella really finds security in Sarah, who babysits her, and really likes Solomon, the day guard/gardener. These are her little circle of people.

Solomon was out washing our car on Sunday morning and Ella stood on the porch in her pajamas and yelled, “Good morning Solomon!! Are you looking at my new tires?” The next morning she peeked out the window and yelled, “Good morning Solomon! Where’s your bicycle?” There were workmen here Sunday and Monday doing work on the houses and the little squirt learned their names. I think she asked them. They were hauling rocks and dirt in wheelbarrows and Ella would exclaim every time they went past, “Ohhh! Heavy!!! Strong and mighty!” Now, ANY guy likes that and they got a kick out of her. Then she’d put rocks and dirt in her little sandbox wheelbarrow and push it alongside them. They liked that even better! She actually has quite a way with men . She marched out onto the porch with her little purple shoes with flowers on them (thanks to her Aunt Becky) and said to one of the guys, “Look at my new shoes! I like them.” Ugandans seem to get a kick out of the excellent English that spews forth from her three and half year old mouth, because of her American vocabulary and slight accent and the fact that she speaks better English than a lot of adults!

Wow. What a gift God gave not only to me, but to my parents, sister, friends and neighbors, six months ago. Thanks on behalf of all of us, God!