Patterns I’ve observed in adoptive families in Uganda

I’ve noticed a few patterns in the adoptive families in Uganda who I’ve met. These patterns relate to adoptive families who are missionaries living in Uganda and are adopting Ugandan children. However, I have also seen these patterns amongst other adoptive parents in different situations, as well.

Observing these families and different situations (and what the Bible has to say about them) has also changed and developed some of my beliefs on adoption.

1. All of the families I know who have adopted from Uganda have adopted at least two children. The only exception is a family whose adoption of their second child failed as they returned to the States and they are still trying to get him. Does this tell you something about what a huge blessing it is to adopt these children? Even I am planning on adopting a second time – not only because of the huge number of orphaned kids here that need families but because another would bless my and Ella’s lives (not to mention my extended family and friends) tremendously.

2. The adoptive families I have met seem to be the people with the best excuses on why they shouldn’t adopt. Be it because of a terminal illness of the adoptive parent, a single parent, the older age of the parent/s, an HIV+ child, a large number of children the similar age in the family, or just large families in general, these are the people who seem to adopt.

It really reminds me of the verse in 2 Corinthians, where Paul is talking about his “thorn in the flesh”. What a great excuse that thorn would have been to “exempt” Paul from the ministry! “ But he [Jesus] said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 Cor. 12:9

Yes, this does cause others to shake their heads at the “irresponsibility” of it all, but us with such obvious “thorns” are the ones who are being blessed!

Sadly, it was other missionaries who kept discouraging me and warning me not to adopt Ella, because of all the unknowns and “inconveniences” she would cause, the “detriment” or “liability” she would be to my ministry, and it just makes me cringe. This causes another verse to come to mind, 1 Corinthians 1:26-29.

Paul states, “Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this word and the despised things – the things that are not – to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him.”

So perhaps this why those of us “fools” are adopting! When we adopt, there is no

question as to why it works because it’s obvious that it sure ain’t because of us!

I am continually amazed by the number of missionaries here in Uganda who have not adopted. Honestly, it just blows me away. Many have struggled and prayed for biological children while orphanages and babies homes are filled to the gills with adoptable children who need homes. So many “normal” missionary families with no excuse not to adopt, yet they don’t! It’s really discouraging and sometimes I think that we “missionaries” are the most faithless Christians there are. This generalization would definitely include myself. I’d probably be around the top of the list!

As time goes on, I am becoming more and more passionate about adoption. Is it a calling or a command? My beliefs have changed radically since adopting. Before I would have said that it was a calling – just because I had that calling didn’t mean that God called everyone to it though (How PC is that??!). Now I believe it is a command, just as the Great Commission is a command. I don’t believe that what Paul meant by “caring for orphans” was simply to build them an orphanage and give them money to survive and be educated!

Rather than offend folks with my rather strong opinions on this subject, I hope that I can instead challenge and encourage them, especially while I’m on furlough.